Finally, as 2020 shuffles to a close, it looks like (some) things are getting better:

No more Trump and his hate-mongering policies

The Biden/Harris administration will be a voice of sanity and balance

The vaccines are coming!

Yes, we can breathe. But, can we relax and completely drop our guard?

I think not. Consider:

About 49% of American voters supported Trump. How can we reconnect with these brothers and sisters (oh, yes they are, even if you don’t want to admit it) and forge ahead? Can we meet somewhere in the middle?

Mitch McConnell continues to dominate the Senate, and he is, arguably, as bad as Trump (maybe worse).

What will happen in Georgia? Will we get two victories and have a slim Senate majority? Less than that could make it tough to pass any legislation in the Senate for the next four years.

As minorities, we have a lot of Trump-created damage to recover from. As LGBTQ people, women, people of color, immigrants and disenfranchised folks, we have many challenges before us. For example, how do we support the legitimate concerns of the BLM movement to address systemic racism? How can we help law enforcement do its job better?

What will the newly-conservative Supreme Court do?

By all means, let’s breathe deeply and celebrate our victories. We have a gay mayor and a democrat-dominated city and county government. There is so much potential for good here in San Diego.

Let’s also be mindful that we need to stay strong and vigilant, as we move forward. Let’s take the skill set that we used in the recent elections and apply it in the coming year(s).

As 2020 comes to a close, let’s give ourselves some credit for getting through a very trying year. “The Great Pause”, as some call the pandemic, has forced us to make big changes in how we live: the emotional and economic uncertainty of COVID, the elections and the cancellation of many important events has made 2020 a really tough year for most people I know.

As 2021 approaches, let’s keep breathing and be open to new things. COVID and Trump will both, hopefully, fade away. What will we do when things return to “normal”? What new things do we want for 2021? What have we learned from “The Great Pause” that we’d like to keep doing when the pause is over and the pace of life speeds up again?

I have learned to embrace technology during COVID. Initially, I resisted on-line psychotherapy, but have come to embrace it. I felt the same way about ZOOM events, at first. Now, I am ready to host one. I am pleased to announce that I am offering my first (and perhaps only) ZOOM workshop: “Power, Love & Presence: The Joys of Getting Older” on Saturday, January 16th from 1 – 3PM. 

The workshop will be based on my upcoming book: “The Gay Man’s Guide to Aging Well”. If you enjoyed my 2019 workshop (“The ART of Aging Well”) at The Studio Door in San Diego, this workshop has all-new content.

Although the workshop will be on ZOOM, it will be an interactive experience: participants will be talking with different men individually (through the use of breakout rooms) as well as discussing topics with the entire group of men. 

To keep it easy and fun to participate, the workshop is limited to a maximum of 20 men. The fee for the workshop is $25 (to pay and reserve your spot, click on the link below). The workshop will run for 2 hours with a 15 minute break midway.

During the workshop, we’ll discuss questions like:

What do you like best about becoming a queer elder?

Where is the power in aging?

What from your past is still haunting you?

Are you experiencing more love as you get older (or less)?

What brings you peace?

Who have you found it hard to forgive?

What have you longed to try but haven’t (yet)?

Want to know more? Contact me at 619-955-3311 (

I hope to see you there!