Parenting Yourself
photo by Alexandra Gavillet for nymag.com Almost everyone I know complains about their parents – clients, friends and relatives alike. Our parents never [...]
Let’s Take Back “Slut”
I was recently at a party where a really beautiful guy walked by a group of gay men. One of the guys in the group [...]
Internalized Homophobia: Do I Sound Gay?
I just saw the movie, "Do I sound gay?" Wow, it sure gave me a lot to think about. The director/star goes through the movie, [...]
Body Fascism
Many men and women I work with are afraid not to be thin, muscular or both. You too? How did we become so critical of [...]
The Art of Not Merging – or – How to Not Lose Yourself in a Relationship
photo courtesy of nymag.com Often, when I counsel newly-married couples, I hear a familiar lament: “I feel like I’ve lost myself since I [...]
“Inside Out” is a wonderful, conceptually daring movie
photo courtesy of pixar I rarely mention movies on this website, but "Inside Out" is brilliant. I won't tell you too much, but [...]
The Joys – and sorrows – of dating Apps
I am the first to admit that I have used dating apps: I even met one of my boyfriends on one (no, I’m not telling [...]
Fat? Old? Ugly?
photo courtesy of vogue.paris I was inspired to write this column after seeing an ad in an LGBT Periodical (not from San Diego). [...]
Beneath Anger, There Is Always Sadness
photo by Dan Roberts for nymag.com In 1995, when I was a Middle School Counselor in San Francisco, I was asked to facilitate [...]
My mom died, how’s your day going?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?t=66&v=lJJT00wqlOo This song - and the accompanying video - is so beautiful. Sufjan Stevens (a favorite of mine) writes/sings his feelings about his mother’s life [...]
The Amazing Lena Dunham talks about Marriage
"Recently, I found a drawing from tenth grade, an anime-inspired rendering of someone meant to be the adult me wearing a shredded lace gown [...]
How to Get Along with Difficult People
photo courtesy of youngjun coo for nymag.com No matter how wonderful your life is, its impossible to avoid difficult people. These unpleasant folks [...]